When people that matter to us become ill, we always want them to get well. We want them to be healed or cured of whatever ails them, and as quickly as possible so they can be restored to us. For believers, we will naturally turn to God for his help in the situation, but sometimes – no matter how hard we’ve prayed or believed – nothing really seems to change.
To my way of thinking, that means there might be some kind of breakdown in the process, something that is throwing the equation off-balance, as it were. In that case, I tend to apply a process of elimination. I reason that God is always faithful, so that means the problem does not lie with Him, and it isn’t really a question of whether he can or will heal. If we have prayed in faith and genuinely expected to see someone’s health restored, then it isn’t a question of whether or not we have enough faith. I might consider if I have been presumptive in praying for healing, but if I have checked with God before praying, then it probably isn’t that. I might then consider that if He has given us the authority to heal the sick, cast out demons and raise the dead, then have we been waiting for Him to do something that we should be doing ourselves?
But if all those parts of the equation are right, then maybe there is some obstacle keeping things out of balance and preventing the sick person from receiving their healing. And that’s what I’d like to talk about today, because it doesn’t always occur to us that something might be in the way. For all we know, maybe the devil has been messing with us, and rather than needing to pray for healing, we just need to be giving him his marching orders instead. Or maybe the intended recipient just needs a little more time for God to reframe their thinking, so our prayers should be addressing that aspect before healing can come.
But in my understanding, sometimes it’s possible that a person receiving prayer for healing does not, deep down inside themselves, actually want to be healed. They may not even be consciously aware of it themselves, but it can be a factor we might need to consider if a healing isn’t manifesting.
A Question of Identity
For some people, it’s a question of identity. This impediment to receiving healing is most likely to appear in those with long term health issues. Whilst they don’t really want to die, they may not necessarily really want to be healed either. They may avidly desire relief from their symptoms, but sometimes people with long term conditions become so accustomed to being the invalid and accommodating the illness, that being the invalid becomes part of their identity and they don’t really know who they are any longer without it.
They may idealise what life without symptoms, sickness or limitations might be like, but having been dependent on others for any length of time, they are no longer really equipped for the reality of living whole by themselves. To get well means having to contemplate taking up the normal responsibilities the rest of us carry daily, but from which the invalid has previously been excused because of their illness. They know how to be an invalid; they don’t necessarily know how to be an independent, responsible person. And sometimes it’s just easier to keep doing what you know – because you know how to do that – and also because the alternative is unknown, and therefore a bit scary.
Attention
Another facet of being ill for any length of time is the amount of attention it garners. Perhaps a sick person has been secretly thriving on the higher levels of attention that being an invalid affords them, because it makes them feel special. And who doesn’t like to feel special sometimes? The thing is though, whether it’s realised or not, a part of them might be fearful or unwilling to relinquish that attention by becoming well. They may want to hold on to the illness because it affords them those feelings of being special.
Income
Being disabled, incapacitated, or unwell for long periods of time may entitle someone to a government or social welfare income. That, in turn, may then facilitate a relatively easy lifestyle (even if the income is low) because it can relieve or absolve them of the normal responsibilities or expectations of adult life, such as working. It’s possible that in some convoluted way, qualifying for that type of income could even help a person to feel validated or justified about their incapacities and inability to work. To be well and whole might mean surrendering that ease. And that isn’t necessarily an issue of laziness, but more of dependency. The longer we rely on something, the more dependent upon it we become; and because we rely and depend upon it, the scarier it is to contemplate life without the sense of support it has provided. In effect, it can create a poverty mentality that causes us to limit ourselves in many areas, and not just the financial. The world of medicine can accidentally end up effectively enabling some people to give in to whatever ailment or condition it is that has entitled them to such an income. It can also inadvertently create a kind of victim mentality within us, thus enabling ourselves and others to expect less of us.
Escape through death
Even though none of us get out this life alive, most of us are driven to do all we can to preserve it. Some people, however, may feel overburdened by the circumstances of their life, and may find the prospect of surrendering to death as a means of finding relief and offering a potential escape from their troubles. If they submit to prayers for healing, it is likely only for the sake of those that care about them, because they either don’t want to hurt the feelings of their loved ones by telling them they actually want to die, or because their courage fails them to be that honest. Although they might willingly submit to being prayed for, their desire is not to be healed. Internally then, they are effectively throwing up a barrier to receiving anything from God that could change the outcome of escape.
There may also be others that might willingly submit to prayer for healing because they are believers, and therefore feel obliged to do so because it is considered the done or expected thing; considered perhaps a matter of religious obedience or submission. Perhaps they submit to prayers for healing because they are afraid of admitting their desire to die because they are worried that others might consider them faithless or un-Christian, or that God will be somehow displeased with them if they do not submit.
Ready to die
Lastly, there will be some people that have internally accepted their approaching death. They might find themselves wearied by all their years because they have reached an older age where death is expected and no longer feared. Some may even welcome death because they are eager to be with Jesus, and our well-meaning prayers for healing could prevent them!
The bottom line
Such things do not always need to make sense to us. These barriers I’ve suggested are simply reasons to consider if we pray for healing and do not see it manifest. For our part, we need to be mindful of our own motivations, and be sure that we are not praying healing just because it’s what we want or think is right. We need to be able to accept that every person has the right to be themselves and not try and impose our own ideals and beliefs upon them. And to accept that sometimes, no matter how hard we have prayed and reasoned and believed, the people we care about will still die without our ever being able to understand why.
no punches pulled 
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